alwayskayaking | Duplicity Inbox

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Duplicity Inbox

Duplicity Inbox

You've reached Tim Stoker. I'm out at the moment. Leave me a message and I'll return your call soon.

Why are you so insistent on thinking her loving someone else means she will no longer love you? I love each of my partners with my entire heart, and they're my entire world. Isn't it possible Sasha feels the same?

Isn't that reason enough for you to ask her directly?

Because I am not a good person. I have so many dark thoughts and desires. That is why I'm sure she would be better off without me.

Nor am I a "good" person by many definitions. You know what I'm capable of, you've seen evidence of my crimes on the network. What little I've shown here is a mere fraction of what I would do if unchained by the city's rules.

If she loves you, she loves you. Why does anything else matter?

Because when we were home, she was replaced and I didn't even notice. I went on to love the thing that killed her. If I really loved her, why didn't I noticed she had been replaced? That seems like it should matter.

From what I understand of what happened, it did everything it could to be her. You remaining in love with your wife through that experience only tells me how much you truly love her.

Perhaps it does matter. Perhaps it means everything to you. But as an outside observer, I can tell you that all I see is a man who is scared of both loving the woman he has and of talking to her about that possibility.

I'm not scared of loving the woman I have. I'm scared of loosing her again and not even knowing it. That's I'll be blind to it. It's just in a different way this time.

You know what's happening this time, Tim. You're not blind. No one is trying to take her from you and she's not trying to leave you behind. Trust yourself. Trust your wife. Trust the relationship you've built and the love you share.

And trust me when I tell you that I will never try to take her away from you. The day I do is the day I'm no longer myself, and I'll give you the knife to end whatever threat I've become.

I'm trying. I'm really trying to trust it. To trust us.

Am I the reason you struggle? Or is there something else between the two of you that I don't know?

Back home, there was a creature that took her. Replaced her. Even the Sasha in our memories. I couldn't remember the real her. Even when we both first showed up here I didn't recognize the woman I loved. What if it's happened again? What if she's been replaced and I haven't noticed again? What if she's starting to fall out of love with me because she's not the real Sasha?

[She knows this story. Sasha told her once. It had sounded terrifying, but she wouldn't have thought it would still weigh on Tim like this when his memories had been fixed.]

There must be some way to test for that. If you can't ask her directly, then why not ask someone who could help you figure it out?

I could ask Jon, but I don't want to always be going to Jon every time I get scared. I don't want to use him like that. He doesn't deserve to be used like a thing.

No, but he might have an idea that you can use on your own without his help. He's got that kind of knowledge. If not in his head, then somewhere in his archive.

I doubt it. Not with this doubt. All I can really do is try to trust her. I am, I'm trying. It's just not easy.

Any effort is worth making when you feel this way. You don't know yet what's going to help you.

Yeah.

[He doesn't know what else to say.]

[There's truly little more that could be said.]

Face your fears, Tim. All will be well in time. The two of you will still have one another for as long as the city allow it.

Take care of her, and yourself. It seems like you both need it.

Then, let's just hope it turns out better here than it did at home.

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